Wednesday, February 14, 2007

The Nintendo Wii Conspiracy

Did you think I was going to let Nintendo off on this blog? Think again!

All is not the land of wine and roses in Nintendland and so many would lead you to believe. I know your grandma and uncle are enamored with Wii Sports, and you are probably giddy that the family is actually approving of video game use for the first time in your life, but I can't help but be the bad guy and point out the issues I've had since I got my Wii.

First off, I haven't relayed the tale of my coming to get one.

I did the all nighter line wait at a Target store to get mine. I was number 17 in line. By the time they opened the doors I was number 32 in line. So many people were there to scalp systems, that they had family members showing up in pajamas to get in line in front of me, and all of the suckers behind me. This is not a lie! It was unbelieveable.

Well that day, is the beginning of my fatal mistake. I only bought one Wii remote, because it was hard enough to convince my wife to let me get the system in the first place having just bought a PS3. Throwing in another 30 bucks for a remote, and 20 for a nunchuck was just not gonna happen.

Silly Silly Steve. Oh, how naive I was!

I haven't seen another remote control for the Wii since that fateful day. Not until today that is, because my wife got Wii Play for me, which came with one. It doesn't really count though, because it's still not a wiimote from off of the shelf. I mean, why would they have those?

Store after store I have searched since November for a stinking CONTROLLER for the game system I already own. Sure, they have classic controllers and nunchucks, both of which are completely freakin' useless without a wiimote to connect to it. Tell me how that works!

Sure, all of the big Nintendo fans are attributing the shortage to the shortage of systems. But how can that be? They made one per system? Why would they do that? Why would they have more extra controllers than remotes? It MAKES NO SENSE!

It all makes sense though now that Wii Play is here. We have to buy up stock of their crappy demo game with a "bonus" controller inside. Believe me when I tell you that it is not more than a demo disk. The games are poor at best.

So, what's the Conspiracy?

I don't know, it's just a catchy title.

But seriously. So many people on various websites are quick to take a dump on the PS3 when you can even find a Wii in any stores, or at the very least the accessories that are made for the system. No component cables and no remotes. What is the point of this?

Since when did the fact that a company can actually manufacture enough systems to get on the shelves equal that the system is a failure? I don't see how PS3 having a million plus systems in people's homes equates a failure. Nintendo's success is measured on the fact that you can't get it anywhere? What is this? Bizarro world? Not being able to buy something is a BAD THING. Maybe I'm crazy, but when I go to the store to buy something, I like for it to be on the shelf. I generally don't get a big kick out of going to store after store for months on end just to find something as a controller for my game system. In fact. It pisses me off!

Lets talk about the Wii now. The novelty of being tired every time I play is starting to wear thin. The lack of any resolution beyond that of 480p is very apparent on my plasma screen tv, and the game library that I do have has relatively second rate graphics, with Zelda being the exception.

The most fun I've had with the system is the virtual console. For example, I had some friends over and we passed the controller (the only one I have) over and over trying to communally beat Super Mario Brothers. Good times. SMB actually looks better on the Wii than I've ever seen it before, which is kinda nice.

Other than that, I don't care about the weather channel. Making Miis is fun. The Voting thing is worthless, and the Opera browser is kinda sorta neat.

The browser is pretty good compared to most game system browsers but the awful resolution of the Wii really shows when you try to read text on any website.

Now we get to the boggling friend matching features. Trying to connect myself to a friend through my Wii is like pulling teeth. For some reason, I can never seem to get it correctly set up. Either you use their email or try using a friend code. WHICH IS IT? Why do I have to learn a freaking 16 digit code that means nothing to me in order to try to connect to someone? The margin for error here is great. I screw this up all the time. # of friends I have with wiis are at least 10. # of friends i've successfully negotiated friendship connections with my system is 3. Why is this so hard? It's nuts. Its univerally frustrating. I don't know anyone who doesn't feel this way.

And I'm spent.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Here's a tip.

Get out more.

or

play Wii sports and channel your frustration through that.

Steve Kramer (a.k.a. Saavedra) said...

Believe it or not, I get out plenty. Take a look around, this is a gaming blog.

Anonymous said...

All Mr. Anon needs to do now is tell you to move out of your mom's basement and get a girlfriend and he'll have the ultimate hat trick of insults against gamers.

Steve Kramer (a.k.a. Saavedra) said...

Actually, I was kinda hoping for that. I really need to get a life!

The Dread Pirate Guy said...

Or perhaps another cat.

Build a cat wall. That would be fun!

Anonymous said...

I like that this is what your thinking about at 11:30 pm on Valentines Day! :)

Anonymous said...

I want to get surround sound for my PlayStation 3 and I was wondering if you have any recommendations on what I should get. When I check out best buy it all "theater systems". I just want surround sound, not a new blue rye DVD etc. I am also planning on what type of HD/LCD TV, what type should I get. (I play Call of Duty 5, games like that) Website links will and store names will help. Any help?